And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. (Deuteronomy 6:6-7 ESV)

Last post (Part 1) gave 3 steps to start being the primary discipler:

1.     Talk to your kids daily about God

2.     Decide what you are going to say.

3.     Pray for your kids and pray with you kids

And this post I want to focus on the first step “Talk to your kids daily about God” by sharing how this works out in my home and by giving some book titles that I believe are must haves in every Christian home with kids (and without:))!

A conversation with my kids after school….

After school yesterday, I was in the kitchen getting snack ready for my kids while they were prepping their lunches for school the next day. My son, Judson, said to me, “Mom, can I have a peanut-free sandwich tomorrow so I can sit with my friend because he is allergic to peanuts?” I said sure and kept prepping their snack. He then proceeded to have a conversation with his sister about his friend, who I guess used to argue in kindergarten with my niece.

I entered back into the conversation when I hear my daughter say, “That is funny that they used to fight.” My heart sank and in that moment I had two choices. I could either say to her “That isn’t very nice to say” or I could remember that I am one of the primary disciplers in our home and use this as a teaching moment. I decided on the later.

I said to my daughter, “Do you remember the bible story you learned the other week in Redeemer Kids where two people were arguing? What did God say about that?”

She looked at me and said “No” right away. But my two sons both immediately started to squirm and started to tell her the answer. I quickly asked them to stop so that she could answer. Well, to make a long story short, after half an hour of her looking through a children’s bible looking for the answer with no luck because most children’s story bibles don’t include the story of Cain killing his brother, I asked one of her brothers to tell her the story of Cain and Able.

He told her the story in complete detail and we then got to have a conversation about what happens in our hearts when we are angry and how unrighteous anger against someone is a sin and not something that is funny. And although this conversation was much longer and more time consuming then just telling her that what she said wasn’t very nice, it was pretty important for all of us.

My daughter got to learn more deeply about anger, my son was able to teach her about the Bible and practice some leadership skills, and I was given a quick assessment into my kids’ knowledge and retention of what they have been learning and what they know and don’t know in terms of their biblical literacy. And all of this came from simply “talk(ing) of them when you sit in your house” after school while we were prepping and eating snack.

These kinds of spontaneous spiritual conversations are super important and we all need to have them all the time as Deuteronomy 6:6-7 instructs but they also need to happen daily at specific and planned times - just like instructing your kids to brush their teeth. Below are some resources I believe will help you to do this during your family devotionals. I know there are tons of other resources that can do these things, but here are a few books that I believe should be in every Christian home and I will break them out by age appropriateness just in terms of what I have seen work for attention spans.

2-5’s:

Everything a Child Should Know About God by Kenneth Taylor and Jenny Brake

From Marty Machowski, author of The Gospel Story Bible, “Everything a Child Should Know About God” is a pre-school dynamite! Kenneth Taylor explains our incomprehensible God in ways even a four-year-old can understand. Get a copy for your family and introduce your young children to our amazing God and the life transforming, powerful, message of the gospel.”

We are currently using this for our family devotional and it has sparked great conversations with all our kids age 7-12.

The Big Picture Story Bible by David Helm

From Trevin K. Wax, Managing Editor, The Gospel Project, “When serving as a pastor, I frequently purchased and gave this Bible to families with young children in hopes that the parents would read and absorb its message. Here’s a Bible storybook that shows the biblical story from Creation to New Testament - a book that anticipates Jesus in the Old Testament and makes his crucifixion and resurrection the proper climax of the New Testament. My wife and I love it. Our kids love it. I cannot recommend it highly enough.”

3 and up:

The Jesus Storybook Bible: Every Story Whispers His Name by Sallie Lloyd-Jones

From Tim Keller, Senior Pastor at Redeemer Presbyterian Church in New York City “I would urge not just families with young children to get this book, but every Christian - from pew warmers, to ministry leaders, seminarians and even theologians! Sally Lloyd-Jones has captured the heart of what is means to find Christ in all the scriptures, and has made clear even to little children that all God’s revelation has been about Jesus from the beginning - a truth not all that commonly recognized even among the very learned.”

Our family uses this bible so much we are on our second copy. The first was getting worn out so we ripped it apart and use it for our advent devotional with the pictures hanging on the wall in our living room each Christmas season. It is an invaluable book to have in your home and to give to friends!

6 and up:

The Gospel Story Bible by Marty Machowski

From Timothy Paul Jones, Ph.D. Associate Professor of Family Ministry, Southern Seminary; editor of The Journal of Family Ministry “I could speak at length about how much I recommend Marty Machowski s books to churches and indeed I do, along with books from a long list of other authors. But Marty s resources for families and children also appear on a far shorter list that places them in a more significant category for me: they are books that I actually use in my home. Again Marty has provided us with a God-centered, Scripture-grounded, gospel-driven resource that orients the minds of children toward the wondrous works of God.”

I hope that theses books bless your families as they have blessed ours!

And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. (Deuteronomy 6:6-7 ESV)

Yup, if you are a parent or a primary care-giver, you have been called by God to teacher your kids about Him everyday, every moment, in everything you do. That seems daunting, right? Over the next few blogs, I hope to break down the above verse into small, manageable parts so that the idea of discipling kids isn’t so overwhelming with the hope that as we intentionally disciple our kids, it will become second nature - something that we do as we sit and walk and lie down and rise and text and drive to soccer practice and grocery shop and play video games…

So here are three ways to start being that primary discipler:

1.  Talk to your kids daily about God.

Pick one time during the day when you will consistently - or as consistently as possible with crazy schedules - talk to your kids about God. This could be at breakfast or dinner or before bed. Just pick one and make it a routine.

One way that family devotionals have been consistent for us as a family is that we do them as we finish our meal…notice I said “as we finish” our meal. The reason we do our devotionals as we finish is to help bridge that age gap span between our 4 kids who are 7-12. They are all in different places emotionally, physically and spiritually so everyone is still “present” during each conversation if they are eating and sitting still even if the conversation takes a more mature turn for our 10 year old son. And to be honest, it also helps me - mom - not be rushing to move on to clean up dishes and get ready for bed, which I was always tempted to do when we did devotionals at the end of the meal.

2.  Decide what you are going to say.

For most of us this seems easy in theory but in reality it is really daunting. Questions like what book in the Bible should I read to my kids first or what devotional should I use or do I need to explain the Trinity first or how do I explain reformed theology to my 4 year-old can make the task seem overwhelming. My advice - just start somewhere.

Over the course of parenting for the last 12 years, my family has started and stopped numerous family devotionals. We have read through proverbs, then the Jesus Storybook Bible, and made it through the first quarter of The Long Story Short probably 3 times. We have used the family devotionals provided by Redeemer Kids, The New City Catechism and even done season devotionals. And we start each with good intentions but sometimes they don’t work for the stage of life our kids are in (we have four spanning from 7-12) or for our schedule.

This might sound like we aren’t very “devoted” to devotionals but the reason I shared that is to say it is simply important to make it a priority, even if the devotional you pick doesn’t work long term. If you make it a regular rhythm in your home, then your kids will begin to expect it to happen and they will grow as disciples in their love of God and the Gospel!

3.  Pray for your kids and pray with your kids.

God is sovereign over His relationship with your kids and with you and you get to be the agent that the Holy Spirit uses to teach your kid about Him. How amazing is that! So spend time in prayer asking God to give you the words to speak to your kids and then model this prayer with your kids so that they grow up praying as well.

And help your kids learn to pray corporately by attending Redeemer’s dinner and prayer night. This will not only help you grow in your prayer life by seeing how the Holy Spirit is prompting others to pray, but it will help kids see that this is an amazing thing - not something weird that only your family does at dinner or at bedtime. Your whole family will get to experience being part of the family of Redeemer and petitioning God together.

I pray that as all of us seek to be the primary disciple makers in our homes that we would experience the amazing power of the Gospel more completely and we would fall more in love with our Savior so that we can pass on these affections to our kids.

8 Items For Christian Parents To Ponder: Along the way he includes a brief but powerful section in which he exhorts parents in the duties they have in raising their children. He wants you, the parent, to seriously consider the responsibility that God has entrusted to you for each one of your children. And, at least for me, each of them felt like a gut-punch. He offers these 8 considerations, asking that you would ponder each one and allow them to motivate you to call your children to respond to the gospel.

Stephen Curry And The Culture of Self-Trust: The gospel transforms our notion of self-worth and identity because it invites us to embrace a sense of meaning and purpose that’s bigger than ourselves. In Christ, we we’re not demoralized by failure or overly impressed by narrow ideas of success, like football tackles or MVP awards or prestigious scholarships and degrees.

How Do I Know I'm A Christian?: Whenever counseling Christians looking for assurance of salvation, I take them to 1 John. This brief epistle is full of help for determining whether we are in the faith or not. In particular, there are three signs in 1 John given to us so we can answer the question “Do I have confidence or condemnation?”

What Does It Mean To "Accept Jesus": Ray Ortlund gives us a very helpful instruction of what is truly means to "Accept Jesus".

7 Truths About Hell: Hell is a difficult reality, but it is something that the Bible teaches, and we can't fully understand God and his world unless we grapple with it. These seven truths should frame our discussion of hell.

9 Things Adult Daughters Want Their Mothers To Know: John Stott notes that Paul’s emphasis falls upon the restraint, not the exercise, of parental authority. He writes, “Children are to obey . . . yet they have a life and personality of their own.” I wonder if these young women and Stott aren’t on the same page. So moms, there you have it, from the younger generation to us older. May we listen and take it to heart.

8 Thoughts To Encourage Your Kids In Schoolwork: As the school year begins I hope all of us – kids and adults alike – remember why we work. It is not to earn our salvation, security, or success. We work because God works. By working well wherever He has placed us, we can reflect His glorious image and worship Him.

How God Defines Success: From a worldly standpoint, they appeared to be failures. Yet, from God’s perspective, they were found faithful. They were true successes in His eyes – and ultimately, only His assessment matters.

Of Whom I Am The Foremost: Jesus goes around making enemies into friends, of himself and each other. He makes them family. How does this work? The gospel.

Do You Think It Happened, Or Not?: That’s what the Bible means when it says, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved” (Rom. 10:9). It means that Jesus, the resurrected and reigning King, the One to whom God has granted all authority in heaven and on earth, has the right and authority to save people from their sin.

The Most Important Thing My Parents Did: Why? I ask the question from time-to-time. Why are all five of my parents’ kids following the Lord, while so many of our friends and their families are not?

In Her Shoes: A Christian Woman Who's Had An Abortion: I ask you today, as I’ve done before, to take a walk in another woman’s shoes: a Christian woman who’s had an abortion. I’ve asked her to share her story so we see the power of Christ’s redemption and so we’re ready and able to respond when someone we know and worship beside confesses an abortion.

What Is A Disciple? 6 Expert Views: After all, the early disciples were called Christians because they were learners, students, and apprentices of Christ. Thus, just as “being Canadian” is a part of the identity of a Canadian citizen, “being Christian” or “being a disciple” is an identity issue. But what exactly is a disciple? What sort of definition should we use to understand our identity?

6 Things Jesus Does With Sin: John the Baptist commands a beholding of the sin-taking-away Lamb. What do we see in this beholding? How exactly does Jesus take away our sin? Here are 6 things Jesus does with sin:

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3 Ways To Encourage Peace Between Generations Within Denominations: In the end, it is important to remember that substance is more valuable than style. We can and should be aggressive when it comes to issues of substance. There are things you cannot be and still be considered within the boundaries of your theological tribe—it isn’t a free-for-all. If you are going to be in a family, value what the family values.

The Simple Beauty Of God's Grace: It’s easy to overlook a little phrase like that. It’s easy to let it be little more than background noise, quickly filtered out. But a couple of weeks ago it was like I heard it again for the first time: “By God’s grace.” It’s a beautiful thing! It is an acknowledgement that without the sweet grace of God, the very opposite would be true. It is an acknowledgement of utter dependency upon God.

Intimacy Or Familiarity: When I consider Bible reading, I see two broad approaches: one that aims for familiarity and one that aims for intimacy. Both are good, both are beautiful, and both have their place.

Slander In The Camp: How many of you have witnessed the evils of slander? Sadly, it happens all the time in circles of people who name Jesus as their King and Redeemer. The more I speak with leaders and fellow Christians, the more I realize how prevalent this is.

More Highly Than You Ought: I’m deeply persuaded that we’re addicted to the pursuit of self-glory because, when we look in the mirror, we think we see someone who deserves to be glorified. Instead of using the mirror of God’s Word to keep our judgment sober, we see an aggrandized version of who the Bible says we actually are. I’ve found that there are four common factors that contribute to this distorted view of self:

Rules For Facebook From Parents To Daughter: As long as we live she will always be the object of our concern and love, but one day we will no longer be responsible for her choices. But for now, these are the rules.

The Secret To Abounding: Growing up in the United States, we are bred to believe that we can accomplish anything we want, that all of our goals and dreams are within reach. We like the idea that we can do anything or everything, and at a glance, Philippians 4:13 seems to support that idea—“I can do all things.” But did Paul really mean that as long as we rely on Christ’s strength we can do anything?

Should I Date A Godly Girl I Do Not Find Attractive?: I appreciate Matt Chandler’s response to the question.

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Does God Harden A Believer's Heart?: In the end, each of us must answer one question above all regarding the condition of our heart: Do I embrace Jesus Christ as the greatest treasure in the universe?

Saved By A Community For A Community: So let's radically love the brother in Sunday school who drives us crazy. Let's invite into our homes the awkward sister no one else approaches. Let's walk into the sanctuary seeking to engage the visitor in conversation. Let's go beyond sports and weather and politics to discuss how the gospel intersects with our lives, our marriages, our families. The more this interaction happens in our churches, the more we will be drawn into the lavish love of the triune God.

Outrage Porn and the Christian Reader: The fact is, so much Internet-based outrage is manufactured outrage, carefully structured to achieve the end of luring eyeballs to articles. This is the worst kind of outrage because it is designed to attract readers, not to bring about change. It serves us, not the other person and not the church or the Lord of the church. And in that way, the “porn” label fits it very well.

Real Forgiveness: A rebuker will make sure that his rebuke is fair enough to stand a chance of being received.  So it is wise to avoid the verb “to be” (“You are . . .”) or the words “always” and “never” (“You always/never . . .”).  Those categories are too absolute to be fair.  They blast the offender to smithereens, with no dignity left.  They presume to redefine what another human being is, and no one but God has the right to do that.  A wise rebuke limits itself to observable behavior.

Lesbian Professor's Fall To Grace: “I still felt like a lesbian, but what is my true identity, I wondered?” she said. “The Bible makes clear the difference between real and true. What is bigger, my lesbian identity… or God’s authority over me?” God won.

Genuine Repentance: I have sinned against you. I have apologized. But how do you know if I mean it?...Here are 12 signs we have a genuinely repentant heart.

Gospel-Centered Reduction: If the gospel isn’t an actor that accomplishes things, we should not speak about it as if it is. Rather, we should speak of the God of the gospel who works through the gospel to accomplish his purposes. If we insist on making the gospel itself an actor in the drama of redemption, we are engaging in a kind of gospel-centered reduction. I doubt anyone intends to do this, but it is an unintended consequence of buzzwords. They can be helpful, but often are not. Instead, they shortchange clear thinking by leading to reductions in our language. We rely on them as shorthand, but in this case, what gets left out is what is really of first importance.

Was Jesus a Celebrity Pastor?: This is important to say: just because so and so happens to be very popular, have a big name, sell books, and so forth, that doesn’t mean they’ve fallen into the celebrity pastor trap. They may just be attracting a lot of attention in the midst of a faithful and smart ministry. I’m struck with the fact that the for the first part of Jesus’ ministry, judging by numbers and popularity alone, Jesus was a celebrity pastor–for a bit.

5 Parenting Opportunities When Our Kids Sin: Sinful behavior in our kids is not an opportunity to war against them, but an opportunity to proclaim the gospel. Here are five ways God can take what was meant for evil and use it for good.

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