This post is by Ashley Bowie, Jesus lover, coffee mistress, wordsmith, in Christ.

I have always known that I wanted to be a writer. I remember constructing stories for my barbies from earliest memory. I remember doing my chores and having to redo them because I had been day dreaming when I was supposed to be dusting. I wrote my oscar acceptance speech for best original screenplay when I was about 12. I was supposed to win that around age 25. I was supposed to be a well established writer with a vacation home by now. While I'm at it I was supposed to have a husband and children by now also. I was supposed to win a thousand souls to the Lord, and I was supposed to fall asleep at night feeling satisfied that I was living the life I was supposed to.

It's an interesting thought isn't it? "Supposed to." It means, this was my expectation and it's not what I'm seeing. It means this is what was expected of me and I have not measured up. I think we have all been there. You feel like you're not doing enough or enough of the right things. You have an image in your head or heart of what you wanted to be, or you want to define yourself a certain way and you get frustrated because it’s not looking like you thought it would or coming as easily as you expected.

We all battle this in different ways. I was supposed to get that promotion, I was supposed to forgive that person, I was supposed to have succeeded, I was supposed to provide for all my family's needs, I was supposed to stop worrying, I was supposed to grow faster in this area. It means, in so many words, I've failed. And to be fair, we do fail, regularly and spectacularly. But the problem with "supposed to" is that it revolves primarily around our own expectations.

Last weekend I attended the Bible and breakfast event for the women of Redeemer. Our speaker Danielle Dow spoke directly out of Ephesians 1 and something she said hit home so much more clearly than it ever has before. She said, "your identity is in Christ." Earth shattering revelation there right? Maybe I'm a little slow because I think most of us only hear that about 10 times a week. Danielle agreed that it was not new information but went on pressing that our entire identity is in Christ.

It does not mean that your identity is hidden somewhere in Christ and that if you dig around long enough you can find the title you were meant for. As though you're putting on a name tag that says "disciple maker," or "mother," or "christian business executive." If you get a title it's this "In Christ." It's stamped on your soul, written on your heart and grafted into the fibers of your brain. If God is "I am" then I am "in Christ." This is my name, my dwelling place, my purpose and my life's ambition all rolled into one.

It's not like your home, where you sleep and eat and then go out into the world to do the things God has given us to do. It's more than clothes that we put on to show the world who we are and who we want to be known as. It's more than a job title with responsibilities, more than a relationship that we delight in. Being "in Christ" is your very skin. It's your heart and your heart's rhythm. It's neurons and fingerprints. In Christ is every piece of your identity.

I have shortened the passage that we walked through, but if you have time you should read the whole thing.

Ephesians 1:3-14
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us IN CHRIST with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us IN HIM before the foundation of the world, … according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. IN HIM we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, … making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth IN CHRIST as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things IN HIM, things in heaven and things on earth. IN HIM we have obtained an inheritance… so that we who were the first to hope IN CHRIST might be to the praise of his glory. IN HIM you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed IN HIM were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance…”

Look at the rich depth of description of all the things you are. If your name and all that you are made of is "in Christ" you are blessed, you are chosen, you are adopted, you are redeemed, you are a worshiper, you have an inheritance, You are sealed with the Holy Spirit. How much grander is this than a job title or a list of accomplishments? How much more satisfying is this knowledge than chasing down dreams of earthly glory?

When I recognize that my identity is "in Christ" pouring coffee for eight hours a day becomes worship and blessing, my life and work becomes disciple making work simply because I "In Christ" am doing it. Struggling through scriptures in search of understanding, or working through forgiving others becomes the holiness he is working out in me. There is no greater level to be reached by getting a promotion, no better version of myself to be found by adding a relationship. Sure these things are tools of God used for sanctification, but they don't redeem me any more, they don't increase my inheritance, they have no impact on my adoption, and they are not worthy of my worship.

This means that the only thing that I am "supposed to be" is IN CHRIST. There are commands in scripture to remain in Him to abide in Him, to listen to his voice and carry out his will. This does require action on our part and certainly we get it wrong from time to time. But it is your name to worship Him, it is your blood to be blessed in Him. So when you start feeling weighed down by all the things you thought your life would be or look like by now just remember that who you are is IN CHRIST, and as you remain and abide, he is guiding you to exactly what you are supposed to be.

Hello, I am in Christ and my name is Ashley

-This weeks post is by Ashley Bowie, a member at Redeemer. She pours an excellent cup of coffee, and loves words the way some people love their pets, or children.

Every March my family celebrates a special holiday. On March 19, 1988, my parents adopted three children from the bad side of life. I was only four; I had a sister who was five and had taught me how to tie my shoes, and how to talk to people and a happy rowdy brother who had just turned two. We were a mess for sure. We had been through a lot in our collective short years and had all the fears and bad habits that came with it. But on that special day, we walked into a new home. We had new beds that were just for us, a big back yard with a wooden swing set, clothes, toys, and family, oh boy was there family. On our first night, there was a huge party. It sort of happened by accident. Everyone knew we were coming home, and they all wanted to stop by and say hello to the kids my parents had chosen. We met neighbors and grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins. Everyone who had prayed and cried with my parents as they went through the soul trying process of adoption was there to celebrate. I still remember meeting our next door neighbors who had a girl my age, and proudly showing her my bed, a top bunk if you can believe it, and the first stuffed animal that was ever mine. 

After all the cake had been eaten, and the presents had been put away, I was staring up into the passionate blue eyes of my new Mom and the gentle hazel of my new Dad. They kissed me and said, "Welcome home, I love you." I don't have many memories before that day; maybe I was too young, or maybe God was protecting me, but I remember every moment of that day. To this day, we all remember and cherish March 19th. It's the day the orphans came home, the day the emptiness was made full, the day we became a family. We call it Gotcha Day because as my Mom and Dad always said, "that's the day we got-cha."

God adopted you. You were born into hardship and subjected to the neglect and abuse of this world; you carry the fears and bad habits that come with it. And then one day, God brought you home. He gave you a safe place, He cares for your needs and gives you family, so much family. Do you remember the day that God "Got-cha?" 

Easter is just around the corner. This is the time of year we remember with sober minds that God sent His only son, to die on our behalf, to bridge the gap between creator and created. This is also the day that God "got-cha." On that day, He paid the price and decided that you belonged to Him, that you would come home, and you would be His child. 

Romans 8:14-17 "For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of adoption as sons by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs - heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ..."

Maybe you think the day that God gotcha was a day that you finally gave up or a day your eyes finally opened. Maybe you were at the end of your rope or at the bottom of the pit. Maybe that's when you saw it, when you finally realized that God has adopted you. But He has wanted you from the beginning and has been calling you home to Himself since the day you were born.

Romans 8:29 "For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, in order that He might be the firstborn among many brothers."

When I was adopted, I was rescued. I was rescued from neglect, and abuse and fear. But I was also brought home. I was given care instead of neglect, compassion instead of abuse, and love instead of fear. It took a while for my little heart to understand that. I didn't realize that I would be fed, so I hid food. I didn't know that mistakes would be met with kindness, so I lied. I think sometimes we focus so much on what God has saved us from, that we forget to recognize what he has saved us to. You were pulled out of the filth of the world so that He could embrace you as His child. You have no need to hide, or cover up. You are home. You are safe. 

No one was going to send me back, this wasn't an accident, there were no regrets and no "plan B" incase this didn't pan out the way they had hoped. If you know anything about post infant adoption, you know that children who have been through a lot, take a lot of love and a lot of work. Attachment disorders, identity disorders, stunted emotional growth, and pathologically deceitful tendencies, these words were in the file of myself, my brother and sister. Imagine what would be in your file right now. Imagine the labels the world would put on you and try to convince you that you don't deserve the love of a Good Father, or that it would be too much work to make you whole again. 

Romans 8:38-39 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Now imagine the impromptu party that happened on your gotcha day. The angels that stopped by to see the child that God had chosen, the family and friends that had prayed for you and were so proud and thrilled that you are now a member of the family. And when the lights go out, and everyone goes home, there He is, your good and great heavenly father looking at you with bright and unending love saying "Welcome home, I love you.”

At Redeemer we love foster care and adoption. We love that a perfect Father has adopted us. We love that imperfect moms and dads get to adopt. As a church we have seen a number of families adopt or serve as foster families and have more in the process. While participating in adoption it is an amazing gift God allows us to enjoy, it can also be overwhelming and intimidating. Below is a first hand account of what one family learned by going through the process of adopting their son from Ethiopia.

____________________

Ethan's Reflection on the adoption process:

In Zechariah 7 God speaks through Zechariah “And the word of the Lord came to Zechariah, saying, 9 “Thus says the Lord of hosts, Render true judgments, show kindness and mercy to one another, 10 do not oppress the widow, the fatherless, the sojourner, or the poor, and let none of you devise evil against another in your heart.”  It is passages like these help us know that God has a heart for the fatherless that has impacted adoption journey and our decision to adopt.  

The reality of this "vertical" adoption of Christ for his people and how we were fatherless and God chose to adopt us as sons and daughters has been probably one of the most impactful realities and truths that drove Kelli and I to adopt our son Kenesa.  Without God's grace and mercy of the "vertical" adoption and an understanding of what that took and how amazing it is, we may have not have been compelled and burdened to care for the fatherless in our world and felt called to "horizontally" adopt a son who had no father half way across the world. This language from the small book "Reclaiming Adoption" by Dan Cruver and others has really impacted us.

God also calls us to care for those who are oppressed or are prone to oppression and we have a deep conviction to God's call to those people as well. Other passages in the Bible that have compelled us much like Zechariah 7:10 is Isaiah 1:23, Jeremiah 5:28 and Exodus 22:21-22 to name a few. Even before God would reveal his Son (Jesus) he was showing us his character and his care for the needy oppressed (fatherless) in the Old Testament.  He knew what we ultimately needed but He also cares about the display of his Glory at all times and this is one way his Glory is shown; the picture of “horizontal” adoption. What it demonstrates is that the Kingdom of God is at hand and it is coming in fullness one day.  God will continue to demonstrate and show his rule and reign over the earth.

We started the process of adopting our son in September of 2011.  It took nearly 2 years for that reality of legally adopting Kenesa to be complete and we were able to bring him home in late August of 2013. It was a very tough process (to say the least). Two of the toughest aspects for us were the unknown length and many ups and downs of the process and also the sacrifice financially that we had to make to bring him home.  God provided for these needs and guided us through these struggles through our local church family as well as our immediate family. The Abba Fund enabled Kelli and I to obtain a no interest loan that paid for the airplane tickets for our first visit to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. This trip was made for the purpose of our court process of legally adopting Kenesa in Ethiopia. It was a blessing to have that paid for and to know that those funds came from the generosity of individuals in our local church.

We now know that this child, our son, has a home and an earthly father. Hopefully one day will be able to call his heavenly father "Savior".  Pray that every night for him.

Kelli's thoughts on the process of adopting her son:

The adoption process has so many highs and lows. I will never forget the day we received our referral for Kenesa. It was February 22, 2013 at 10:00 am. I was getting ready to leave the house and the agency called asking if I wanted to see a picture of our son! I was in tears and so excited! I raced down to Ethan’s office with our daughters Lucy and Madeline; we all laid eyes on that picture of our son for the first time. He was beautiful. I instantly knew the Lord had picked him to be a part of our family. We then had to wait 3 months until we got to fly and meet our sweet boy for the first time. Meeting Kenesa was one of the best days of my life. He had and still has a huge smile. Even though we knew we had to go back home and leave him behind leaving Kenesa in Ethiopia was so hard. We had to return home and waited for the U.S. Embassy approval.

I would wake up every night at 3 am checking my email (1 pm Ethiopia time) for that approval email.  I would constantly be thinking of him lying there in his crib and I wanted to be with him so badly. Why was this taking so long? Why couldn’t my son be at home with me where he was supposed to be? In those moments I had to preach scripture to myself, I had to pray, I had to remember that I have comfort and security in my Savior not in this adoption and its process. In those moments God was telling me to “be still” He needed me to know that he was in control, he had been in control this whole time and that he was going to bring my Son home. My good friend told me that when I pictured my son laying in his crib that I needed to picture Jesus laying in the crib with him and that was massively helpful.  

We finally got clearance to bring him home in August of 2013. Receiving the email that we could bring home Kenesa was another day I will never forget. Traveling to pick him up and taking him home to meet the rest of his family was just amazing. There were times during the process that I was angry, angry with God, angry with our agency, angry at the increasing cost, angry at how long it took. Our church family and immediate family was such a huge support to Ethan and I. Praying for us, giving financially, and just loving and caring for us as we went through this process.

What I have learned is that God’s timing is not our timing but it is perfect, just and right. God needs us to “Be still and know that I am God”. He has always has a plan; he wants us to trust in him. 

__________________

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth. - Ephesians 1:3-10

Through Christ we have been adopted into God's family. Through Christ we now have an identity as sons and daughters of God. Through Christ we are shown that adoption is an amazing eternal reality by God that we get to show towards others here on earth. Through Christ we are free to pursue earthly adoption, to bring children who have no family and bring them into our family. Adoption and Foster Care are beautiful moments that ultimately point to the wonderful process God went through to adopt us into His family. It is because of Jesus Christ we are able to say we have been adopted for eternity, and the wonderful part about it is that we can not repay God for what he has done to adopt us. Grace from God is an eternal gift but it cost sure cost something. It cost our Savior His life. 

If you know of someone that has gone, going or plans on going through the process of adoption and/or foster care. Take some time this week to ask them their story.

photo credit: Chiceaux via photopin cc

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. In celebration of  National Adoption Awareness Month, we’re sharing adoption stories from different families at Redeemer.

The following blog is from Kati Berreth, a member of Redeemer, reflecting on her family's call to adopt.

Take a minute or two and listen to this song: http://stevencurtischapman.com/music/all-i-really-want-christmas

"And from everything I've heard, it sounds like the greatest gift on earth would be a mom." This line gets me even now. It makes my heart flutter and the tears well up, just as it did all those years ago.

"All I Really Want" by Steven Curtis Chapman kept playing in my car the month after Owen was born and Rob, my husband, had felt called to adopt. Which, of course, was within minutes of holding his newborn son.

I had just given birth to Owen and Rob was holding him for the first time. Rob looked down into Owen's eyes and he then whispered in my ear, "I think we have room for one more. We have room for a child who doesn't have a mom or a dad." I looked at him as if he were crazy, and probably said something to that effect as well - that part isn't as clear to me.

But what is clear is that during the whole Christmas season following that November, this song made me cry in sadness and frustration...often causing me to change to the next song on the CD quickly. I had just had a baby, our second baby, and I had no plans to adopt.

But God did. After Rob's call, and a discussion that ended with me asking for time to adjust to life with Emma and Owen, a year past. It was time again for this song to begin playing in my car and I began to pray about this call to adopt that had been so clearly placed on Rob's heart. I will be honest, I was scared. This for me was probably the most intense test of my faith.

And yet, after a season of prayer and wrestling with giving up my plans for God's plans, we did decide to adopt a little girl from China. And what ensued over the next four years was a journey that not only led us to adopt a little girl from China, but first to adopt Judson, an eight-month-old from Ethiopia. And then we welcomed Lilli, a two and a half year old from China, into our home.'

So now as I listen to this song each Christmas, I still cry. I cry for the journey that God had me on. I cry over my struggle and how God changed my heart. I cry for joy over the two beautiful children that God so graciously brought into our family. I cry because I get to be their mom. And I cry for the kids who are still waiting. Waiting for a mom and a dad. Waiting for a family.

I am adopted into God's family because God chose me and because Christ graciously gave up his life on the cross for my freedom from the wrath of God for my sin. I did nothing to deserve this. And whether I had been obedient or not during this journey, my standing as a daughter of God would still have been secure. But because of this amazing and overwhelming love and grace, God did change my heart and I was given the opportunity to grow in faith, grow in obedience, and grow in love as I was given the gift of being the mom of Emma, Owen, Lilli and Judson.

How is the Gospel opening your eyes in terms of adoption this season?

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. In celebration of  National Adoption Awareness Month, we're sharing stories from different families at Redeemer.

The following blog is from Stephanie Sund, a member of Redeemer, reflecting on the adoption of their daughter, Mekdes.

I had the immense pleasure of spending a morning alone with Mekdes last week while my other two were at school (we're at two different schools again this year).  I suggested going out for donuts, she asked if we might be able to go for a bike ride instead.  Yes! That would be MUCH healthier, great idea!  We packed up our bikes and headed to the lake for a ride.  It was a beautiful fall day with yellow leaves reflecting in the lake and I was so glad to be there, on the bike I hadn't ridden in ages, with my girl who is a beacon of light and joy in my life- so incredibly far from where we were a year ago! But, this time, instead of reflecting on how she has changed, I started thinking about how much I have changed because of her.  I am so much healthier now because of her and here are a few examples:

•   I have never exercised as much or as consistently as I have since Mekdes came home, what at first was a stress relief is now a healthy daily habit.
• I am more organized, first because with 3 kids I just need to be, but also because Mekdes needed routine.  Getting our family into routine made me realize how much we all thrive in knowing what is expected of us when. I feel that we flounder less with our time and get more done with less stress.  Life has enough kinks to keep us from getting bored, our routine helps our lives run smoother!
• We eat more beans/legumes, Mekdes really likes beans and it winds up that the rest of the family enjoys them too.  I started visiting the dry goods section of the grocery store and making more recipes with legumes and vegetables, only eating meat 2-3 times a week.  Some meals, like the  sprouted bean soup I made tonight, wasn't my favorite, but it was full of good food and both my girls devoured it, so I'll make it again.
• Spiritually I feel that I have a greater understanding of God's love for us and adopting us into His family.  He doesn't love us because we are beautiful, in His love we are made beautiful.

When I look back at the first difficult year with Mekdes I don't think so much of how hard it was, the predominant thought is HOW BEAUTIFUL IT IS! It was a beautiful year! Yes hard, but my goodness, what a gift to see this child's life transform before us! I was thinking all this as we pedaled along, and out of the blue Mekdes said, "Mom, I love you!" and I wanted to jump off my bike and squeeze her so tight, because I love her SO much and she is such a gift, and I began to wonder if I would be so awestruck by my love for her if we hadn't struggled so hard to get here.   We began to peddle uphill and Mekdes spoke up "I don't like the uphills, downhills are much funner." Then as if to answer my question, she continued "Guess you can't have the downhills without the uphills." And as we sped down the hill, Mekdes shouted into the wind "Thank you downhill!" and in laughter my heart echoed  "Yes! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you downhill!"

November is National Adoption Awareness Month. To help promote awareness about adoption, we'll be sharing a few posts about adoption, ranging from stories about Redeemer families who have adopted to devotional reflections on the doctrine of adoption.

The following blog is from Greg Sund, a pastor at Redeemer, reflecting on the doctrine of adoption from his History of Redemption Blog Series:

Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him.  In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace.  For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son; and these whom He predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified. – Ephesians 1:4-6 NASB; Romans 8:29-30 NASB.

These verses are incredible.  They are so pregnant with doctrine and theology and truth about God, that I feel as if my head will explode with each step forward I take.  I feel like I could write a thousand blog posts based off of these 94 words.

While you may think of yourself as “called” or “chosen” or “in Christ”, how often do you consider that you were chosen “before the foundation of the world”.  That should cause YOUR head to explode.  Before God spoke the earth into existence by the breath of His mouth, He knew you, He loved you, and He chose you.  If you think you are significant because of your intelligence, or your charm, or your beauty, remember that God chose you before the foundation of the world.  It was THEN that He adopted you into His family.  It was not when you decided to follow Christ, or when you got your act together, or when you “figured it all out”.  It was before the foundation of the world.  Spend some time thinking about that, and let it blow your mind away.  This should point you not to your achievement and your success but to an eternal and sovereign God who is so loving and so kind that He would adopt you and love you and conform you to the image of His Son.

Adoption is a theological topic that is very dear to me, as I now have two adopted children.  I realize that any comparison I would draw between my adoption of them, and God’s adoption of me is limited and probably fraught with danger, given the infinite difference between myself and God.  But I do sometimes think about how my children, before they were adopted by my wife and I were helpless.  They could do nothing to “get adopted”.  They could not merit my favor, they could not impress me, they could not charm me into adopting them.  I loved them before I met them.  I loved them from the day back in 2002 when God called me to eventually adopt them, 7 and then 9 years later.  God loved me before the foundation of the world.  He called me to one day be holy and blameless before Him.  And since I could not make myself holy and blameless, He sent His Son Jesus Christ, to atone for all of my sins and to clothe me in His robe of holiness, that I could now stand before my Holy God, my Father, who adopted me, before the foundation of the world, who called me, who justified me, and who will one day glorify me, the praise of the glory of HIS grace!

For a wonderful discussion of the “order of salvation” (ordo salutis) please see Wayne Grudem’s book, Systematic Theology, Chapter 32.

“But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.  And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying ‘Abba!’ Father!  So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God” (Galatians 4:4-7).